Gluten Free Jokes… you might be a Celiac!

(In my best Jeff Foxworthy voice….)

If your Christmas ornaments are made out of shotgun shells….. you might be a Redneck!

If you know what I mean by “loose stool”….. you might be a celiac!

If you have gotten over the fear of pooping in public….. you might be a celiac!

If you have ever believed that your gut was going to explode….. you might be a celiac!

If you find yourself reading more food labels than emails….. you might be a celiac!

If you can read an ingredient labels in micro-seconds….. you might be a celiac!

If you take more Imodium than vitamins….. you might be a celiac!

If you use your inability to drink beer as a reason to drink top shelf liquor….. you might be a celiac!

If people don’t know your name but remember you eat gluten free….. you might be a celiac!

If you’re always asking your friends for the list of ingredients they used for dinner….. you might be a celiac!

If you notice you constantly use the word “rice” as a adjective….. you might be a celiac.

If the pantry is full and there’s nothing you can eat…literally!!….. you might be a celiac.

If you have to explain to every waiter what gluten is….. you might be a celiac!

If beer gives you more than just the “beer farts”….. you might be a celiac!

If you thought you were hearing voices, but it turned out to be the gluten you just ate….. you might be a celiac!

If you have more gas than a filling station….. you might be a celiac!

Additions: If you can think of a new one, let me know.  I’ll add it.

mgcad

29 thoughts on “Gluten Free Jokes… you might be a Celiac!”

  1. If you have an unnatural fear od using other people’s kitchens…

    If you use the word ‘gluten’ as a verb, ie “I think I’ve been glutened!”…

    If the fact that a restaurant has a dessert that you can actually eat almost brings you to tears of joy…

  2. if you have ever cursed out-loud as you read the ingredients in the store. EX: the flour is made of beans, the beano has wheat. You’ve Got To Be KIDDING ME, SH**T

  3. If you’ve developed a schpeel to go along with every dish you eat in public…

    If you have to shop at eight different grocery stores to get just the basics…

    If your family and friends have gotten used to talking to you on the phone while you’re on the toilet…

  4. I will immediately clutch your rss as I can not to find your email subscription link or newsletter service. Do you’ve any? Please allow me recognise in order that I could subscribe. Thanks.

  5. If you pay the price of a while Pizza for a slice…

    If you give people dirty looks thinking they might have just dipped Gluten in non gluten product ( like a reg person would know)

    If your waiters feel like the are being cross examined when you ask about their kitchens and food prep.

    If you farted a little while reading this!

  6. Today, I went to the beach front with my kids. I found a sea shell and gave it to my 4 year old daughter and said “You can hear the ocean if you put this to your ear.” She placed the shell to her ear and screamed. There was a hermit crab inside and it pinched her ear. She never wants to go back! LoL I know this is totally off topic but I had to tell someone!

  7. Hi there! This is kind of off topic but I need some advice from an established
    blog. Is it hard to set up your own blog? I’m not very techincal but I can figure things out pretty fast.
    I’m thinking about creating my own but I’m not
    sure where to start. Do you have any points or suggestions?
    Appreciate it

  8. En este proceso de construcción de la figura del reportero gráfico hay que destacar además los trabajos de los autores de referencia, una consideración que jamás se había contemplado en nuestro país, formados la mayoría de ellos en las redacciones de los principales periódicos nacionales como El País Diario 16, y revistas de divulgación como Tiempo e Interviú.

  9. Heya are using WordPress for your blog platform? I’m new to the blog world but I’m trying to get started and set up my own. Do you need any coding expertise to make your own blog? Any help would be really appreciated!

  10. Hi just wanted to give you a brief heads up and let you know a few of the pictures aren’t loading correctly. I’m not sure why but I think its a linking issue. I’ve tried it in two different web browsers and both show the same outcome.

  11. I was curious if you ever thought of changing the structure of your website? Its very well written; I love what youve got to say. But maybe you could a little more in the way of content so people could connect with it better. Youve got an awful lot of text for only having 1 or two pictures. Maybe you could space it out better?

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *